will he miss me if I leave him alone?? well, the answer is a little more complicated than that. READ ON.

Going through a breakup is a really tough thing and if you really want to get him back there are certain things you have to know before you can do so.

So many people are wondering how they can get their ex back and how they can do some sort of manipulation tactic to get them back, but the truth is there are certain things that work in certain things that just don’t work.

the no contact rule is one of those things that you can use to create some sort of scarcity, but it doesn’t work immediately. it takes some time to implement and there are certain stages that you have to understand.

and that’s going to be the topic of discussion today does silence or backing away make a man miss you?

Does he miss me?

Of course, he’s going to miss you there going to be points in time when he will think about you for quite some time, but the beginning of a breakup is usually called the relief period

The reason it’s called that is that there are five stages to no contact which I will link to in this video here.

The first stage is relief. This is usually because they have been thinking about breaking up with you for quite some time. could have been several days, weeks, months, or even years depending on how long you’ve been together.

In my work, I have come to the conclusion that too much negativity on a consistent basis will breed a breakup. Negativity can seem like many different forms. but the two that I have seen so far are complacency and insecurity.

If your relationship is mostly good of course there are going to be times when he misses you and wants to see you and text you hang out with you, etc. but right now he is in the relief stage.

If I leave him alone, will he come back?

if you pull your attention away from anybody who breaks up with you whether you’re a man or woman it will completely catch them off guard because they’re expecting you to chase. they know that you love them, so they have something called dumpers confidence or dumpers arrogance.

which simply means that they think they can get you back at any point. Eventually, he will wonder why you haven’t messaged him or texted him trying to get him back and the power will shift at that point.

That does not mean that he will immediately come back to you, but it will help you instead of hurt you.

One thing that goes over most people’s heads the idea of attraction. most people think attraction is just a physical thing but really it is also how they perceive you in their mind. Are they attracted to you are they repulsed by you? if you chase somebody who does not want you it’s a repulsive energy

So, if you leave him alone it’s actually a far more attractive energy. respect needs to come before love.

What if he forgets about me

This is the most common question that people have during coaching calls

it is very counter-intuitive to walk away and really mean it. we are hardwired to seek a reason why we’re being left behind.

sometimes your ex might not even know why they’re leaving you they will just say something along the lines of “I’m not feeling it anymore”.

most of the time this just means they’re not attracted to you anymore.

I understand how much anxiety you’re going to feel giving them a whole lot of space after a breakup but this is exactly what they need.

no amount of you chasing is going to change their mind so you just need to let them go right now.

how to let him go and leave him alone

I know this is a very hard thing to face but right now the best thing for both of you is space and time. the last thing they want is to see your face because it’s going to bring up negative emotions. Why?

because they just spent a whole lot of time wondering if breaking up with you is a good or a bad idea.

they need to miss you first so right now you need to let him go. one of the best things that you can do is stay busy and hang out with your friends as much as possible even though the last thing you really want to do.

In my coaching program, I talk about the five pillars

• Health
• Wealth
• personal development
• relationships
• social circle

The reason I mention these things is that you need to work on yourself as an individual. if they last attraction for you which is most likely the case then something about you might be turning them off.

The breakup period Is a great time for reflection so that you can look back at yourself and work on some issues.

men and women are looking for very different things but generally, we want the person that we’re dating to be high value.

Getting in the gym and being in great physical shape is one way that you can vastly improve your value. The reason why this is because most people nowadays are overweight.

men are very visual creatures. if you’re in great shape and you’re looking really good it will make him think twice.

Men don’t really care too much about how much money you’re making as a woman. he’s going to be far more interested in how you look and your attitude.

Cut all contact and if you need to you can unfollow or silence their social media pages so you can’t see what they’re doing. no contact is much harder when you see them having a great time without you. it will make you question if you’re making the right decision and sometimes that will make you think that chasing is a good idea.

The no-contact rule and all its benefits

It stops the bleeding

one of the first things that people do when they go through a breakup is making things way worse. They chase. they cry they beg, they plead. no contact will help stop the bleeding.

earlier I said negativity breeds breakups if you keep adding more and more negativity to the situation it’ll be a lot harder for them to see you in any kind of positive light. remember they must respect you. if you don’t give him any space and continued to be all over him it will just annoy him and drive him further and further away from you.

when you give more space he will give them time to think about you organically and when this happens subconsciously they will say “I’m thinking about her so I must miss her”

this is when the dumper begins to forget all of the negativity about the breakup and they start to see you through rose-coloured glasses.

His attraction will start growing for you again

this is one of the most important parts of the entire break up as I mentioned before. when you give space, this is when attraction has time to grow and breathe. it’s like oxygen to a fire.

In the back of his mind, he wants to know that he was with a confident person. If you respect yourself, he will respect you. attraction must go up again in order for him to want to be with you again. I understand this sounds bad but that’s the way that it is. something about people is they like to ignore reality simply because it hurts. A great quote I heard was

“You can ignore reality, but you can’t ignore the consequences of ignoring reality”

The second that you see reality for what it is you can start putting the work in to fix whatever problem there was in the first place.

He’ll begin to miss you and want you back

Now, this is the turning point because as you become more and more attractive, he’ll begin to start thinking of you in a more positive way. we want a lot more positive emotions and thoughts than negative ones.

as the negativity dial starts to come down he will begin to think about you in a more positive way which will get him to reach out to you.

one of the biggest mistakes that I see is people jumping all over the opportunity to see their X and tell them how much they miss them and want them back. this is a major mistake and you need to go really slow.

how to make him want you back

Men are looking for certain things in relationships just like women are looking for certain things in relationships. men want to know that you’re going to be listening to exactly what they’re telling you and this goes back to the point of are you ignoring reality.

a lot of people fall into complacency during a relationship and think that their partner will never leave them so they began to get lazy. with this laziness they stop listening and stop caring about what their partners needs and wants are.

listen to what he is saying to you

I understand there may be things about him that you probably want him to change but he is the one who walked away from you. he is the one that decided that he did not want you anymore so you have no bargaining power here.

The reason I bring this up is during coaching calls this is one of the things that students constantly say. The person who wants the relationship less has more power generally speaking.

The first thing that he’s going to realize is that you actually started giving him space. this will drive respect up because you were actually listening to him. if you don’t he will continue to see you in a negative light and it will bring up all of the other negative things in his mind from the relationship.

you are maturing

the thing about adults is sometimes they don’t really grow up. they think they can get their way by kicking and screaming because maybe that’s something their parents did. in a relationship, it is a two-way street of communication and compromise.

if you actually back off properly and give him space, he will see you as a mature adult strong woman. He will think of you in a more respectful manner. always remember to value yourself and your energy.

You’re strong

Don’t underestimate how much strength is an attractive trait to have. it’s something that turns humans on in general. sometimes during a break up, they will put you in the “orbiter zone” as I like to call it.

What this means is he’s going to exercise options and live his life and keep you on the back burner while he does his thing. If you respect yourself and your energy, you are not going to put up with this and you’re going to walk away. never be somebody’s backup plan.

No contact can take a lot of time

no contact is just a tool and nothing more. one of the most powerful things that my students do which helps them get their ex back is working on themselves intensely. focusing on goals. if you focus your energy on you and not him this will help you in the long run.

no contact can take some time and you never know really when is going to kick in until they send that text of course. no contact is really hard in the beginning, especially because you guys had a routine. it’s going to be hard to break away from that routine since it’s now part of your identity.

slow and steady wins the race here. you don’t want to rush back into things especially if there hasn’t been too much work done.

no contact can be very effective if you implement it correctly and stop chasing.

if you want one-on-one coaching with me let me know it’s on this page